Ten conversations decide a marriage. Have them first.
In a fixed order, paced to your wedding date. The difficult ones arrive only once you’re ready.
The ten chapters, in order
01
Money, and how you’ll decide
Who earns, who decides, what you owe, and the spending neither of you apologises for. It is first because it is the one most couples assume they have already discussed.
your money ruleFree · now
- 01Money, and how you’ll decideyour money rule
- 02Family, and the two of youyour united front
- 03Conflict, and how you repairyour repair plan
- 04Careers, and whose movesthe next move, mapped
- 05The home you’ll keepwho does what, agreed
- 06Friendships and time aparttime that stays yours
- 07Intimacy and closenessat your own depth
- 08Children, and the question of themwhether, and when
- 09Faith, ritual and the everydayone ritual of your own
- 10The first year, rehearsedyour ten lines
Chapters 01–05
The ones you have already half-had, finished properly.
What you decide stays decided.
An open notebook and two used mugs on a wooden table after a conversation
This is all it asks of you.
- i
You answer, alone.Money, obligations, the spending no one apologises for.
- ii
You sit down, together.One evening, phones down. The app sets the agenda, then leaves.
- iii
You write one line, and both sign it.That line is yours for good.
“Our money lives in one pot — and each of us keeps a corner no one has to explain.”
Written by a couple · chapter one · free, in full
Ten lines, written by the two of you.
7 of ten written
-
Before the vows
Chapter one
Chapter one is free
chapter one Money, and how you’ll decide
your money rule
Our money lives in one pot — and each of us keeps a corner no one has to explain.
The line the two of you kept -
Before the vows
Chapter two
Chapter two of ten
chapter two Family, and the two of you
your united front
We answer our families together, or not at all.
The line the two of you kept -
Before the vows
Chapter three
Chapter three of ten
chapter three Conflict, and how you repair
your repair plan
We will not use silence as a weapon.
The line the two of you kept -
Before the vows
Chapter four
Chapter four of ten
chapter four Careers, and whose moves
the next move, mapped
Whoever moves for work, the other one chooses the city after.
The line the two of you kept -
Before the vows
Chapter five
Chapter five of ten
chapter five The home you’ll keep
who does what, agreed
Whoever cooks does not wash up. This is not negotiable.
The line the two of you kept -
Before the vows
Chapter six
Chapter six of ten
chapter six Friendships and time apart
time that stays yours
One evening a week is ours. One belongs to neither of us.
The line the two of you kept -
Before the vows
Chapter seven
Chapter seven of ten
chapter seven Intimacy and closeness
at your own depth
We say it plainly, or we say that we cannot yet.
The line the two of you kept -
Before the vows
Chapter eight
Chapter eight of ten
chapter eight Children, and the question of them
whether, and when
Chapter eight is still ahead of you -
Before the vows
Chapter nine
Chapter nine of ten
chapter nine Faith, ritual and the everyday
one ritual of your own
Chapter nine is still ahead of you -
Before the vows
Chapter ten
Chapter ten of ten
chapter ten The first year, rehearsed
your ten lines
Chapter ten is still ahead of you
Take the top one off
Chapter one is free.
The current price appears in the app before you begin chapter two.
Questions.
Is this a test of our relationship?
What if our answers don’t match?
My partner didn’t choose this. Will it feel like homework?
What does it cost?
Begin with chapter one. It’s free.
Who sees what you write — what stays yours
What each chapter asks — the questions to ask before you marry
Get the appPhotograph to come
the finished Vowbook closed on a shelf months later, domestic and unstaged